Don't Lose Yourself in the Run Up to Christmas

It's that time of year when the calendar is crammed, your inbox is breeding, and everyone wants everything "before Christmas." You tell yourself you'll just push through. Eight more weeks. Head down. You'll catch your breath on the beach in your break.

Here's the trouble with that mindset. Push-through mode works brilliantly at getting things done but it's not so good at keeping you present while you do them.

I see it so often - too many of us arrive at the Christmas break ticking every box, yet feeling like an exhausted stranger to ourselves. Flat, frazzled and snappy with the people we love the most and desperately needing the first week of holiday just to remember who we are.

It doesn't have to go that way this year - there's still time to approach it differently.

What losing yourself actually looks like

It rarely announces itself. It creeps in quietly while you're busy being capable and diligent to get things done, at work and at home. Watch for these signs:

• You're running on autopilot. Meetings blur together and you drive home and can't remember the trip.

• Your non-negotiables have quietly negotiated themselves away. The walk, the gym, the Friday dinner with friends and you say "Just until things calm down."

• Your fuse is shorter. Small things land big. You hear yourself and think, that's not me, oh I desperately need a break.

• You're saying yes on reflex. Then resenting it at 10pm.

• You've stopped noticing what you need. Hungry, tired, overstimulated - you only realise once you've crashed.

• Your presence has gone. You're physically there, mentally three tasks ahead. People can feel it, hear it and see it, even if they don't say so.

If you recognised yourself in these, you're not failing. You're human, at the busiest end of the year. But it's your signal to lead yourself differently, starting now.

How to stay "you" all the way to the break

This isn't about doing less (though that helps 😉). It's about leading yourself as deliberately as you lead your work.

1. Decide how you want to arrive

Before you plan what you'll get done, decide who you want to be in the last few days of work. Calm? Proud? Still laughing? Write it down. Then check your choices against it each week. It's your compass when everything feels urgent.

2. Protect two non-negotiables

Not ten. Two. The things that keep you most like yourself - a morning walk, a screen-free dinner, an hour on Sunday that's just yours. Put them in the diary like a client meeting. Then treat them with the same respect.

3. Build in micro-pauses

You don't need a retreat. You need ninety seconds - a quick pause. Between meetings, pause. Check in on yourself - How am I, really? Tiny pauses keep you present instead of permanently in the future.

4. Let "before Christmas" be a question, not a law

Ask yourself and other people: does this genuinely need doing this year, or does it just feel that way? You'll be surprised how much can wait until January. A clear, kind "not yet" is a gift to you and to them.

5. Notice your early warning signs

Know your personal signs - the shorter fuse, the 2am wake up and overthinking, the reaching for wine or your phone. When you spot one, don't push harder. Pause and adjust. That's self-leadership in action.

6. Finish well, not just finish

In the last week, block an hour to close out the year with intention. What went well? What are you proud of? What will you leave behind? You'll walk into your break lighter — and actually rest, instead of spending a week recovering.

The real finish line

The work will always expand to fill the weeks before Christmas, that's not changing. What can change is whether you show up for it as yourself - present, clear and still connected to what matters.

So, here's my challenge. Pick one idea from this list and start it this week. Not in December BUT NOW!

You deserve to arrive at the break with something left in the tank to enjoy Christmas and to actually be present and connected.

Sending you inspiration,

Sue